Marvin X at San Francisco Ocean Beach at sunset
photo Adam Turner
Parable of Stupid Shit
The world is full of stupid shit. I was taught in Boy Scout's: Be Prepared. The Bible says adorn yourselves with the armor of God and guard against being deceived. Is there any doubt we are living in the most dangerous times in the history of the world? You must strengthen your immune system to the max, plus keep your social distance from the toxic ones, no matter family or friends. When his family came for him, Jesus denied them, instead said his family was his disciples. In the film Godfather Part II, the theme is how your family will whack you. So much for the stupid shit of families. Go to Probate Court to see how much brothers and sisters love each other after mama and daddy are dearly departed.
So have no patience with stupid shit from stupid ones, family or friends. Alas, what did Bob Marley sing to us, "With my friends I don't need enemies." Best to separate yourself and walk alone. Aristotle said, "He who has many friends has no friends." In jail and prison we are taught to ride your own beef, don't get involved in another inmates problems, although I did make money in prison writing letters to judges for inmates. But I road my own beef until I was appointed Nation of Islam Minister that forced me to care about other brothers although I still had to focus on my own beef or case. A brother with short time can get you involved with his case, alas, have the hold prison population stressed out about his beef because he is stressing and only has a short time before he is released. Why should you be diverted about his stupid shit when another brother is calmly doing his ten years without stressing anyone, especially not the entire prison population.
A military man told me to walk alone so no one can betray you except yourself. In his office, he pointed to pictures of him with VIPs and asked me what did I see. Without waiting for my answer, he said, with all those VIPs I am by myself. If I'd had another person with me there would be the possibility they would betray me for personal gain, or jealousy and envy.
Of course his wisdom contradicts the wisdom of Solomon who said if you are by yourself and fall, who shall lift you up? We love the wisdom of Solomon in Ecclesiastic but he too informed us we may have a child or friend who shall betray us, no matter how much love we shower upon them. In the world of today, we call such children and friends Ungrateful Bastards. Of course, Luke taught us to keep the faith because so-called ungrateful bastards may find their way home as Prodigal Son.
A dear friend persists in proclaiming to me the endgame of his ungrateful bastard children and mine shall come home in the manner of the Prodigal Son. His proscribes patience, alas, the patience of Job, and prepares the way for the return of his ungrateful sons, daughters and grandchildren. But when they did indeed have reason to return, he did not receive them in the name of love, rather in bitterness for their prolonged absence, especially since he forever desired and awaited their love since he was prepared to give them the same.
He imagined many of them suffered the toxicity of their mothers who poisoned their children due to the neglect and abandonment of him as father. Yet, many fathers were without fathers themselves so they could not exercise the manhood training they were devoid. "How can I be a father when I have never seen a father who stuck by a mother and children through thick and thin?" And even when a father is present, if he suffers the multitude of negrocities (AB term), there is no guarantee family life and the resulting manhood and womanhood rites shall be successful, producing the next generation of mature adults rather than children with dysfunctional personalities. We recently heard the testimony of a woman whose parents were married 67 years, yet she told of how they had abused each other during her childhood and entire life, yet they were together, which didn't help her when she advanced to womanhood and sought a functional and healthy relationship.
Sadly, I must cosign with her since I frequently visit my long-term married friends whose interaction does nothing to inspire me to be in a relationship, especially in the fourth quarter of my life when I only want to be creative although it would be nice to have a loving partner as I end my mission on earth. But the observance of my dear friends is perhaps as painful as the woman above who experienced the 67 year marriage of her parents, full of emotional and verbal abuse, thank God she did not mention physical abuse.
Mothers are often forced to teach their children to not rely on a man since it was the reality in her and her children's lives. In a poignant letter to me from my daughter, she said, "Dad, you say you love me, but don't support me. Mama says she loves me and feeds and clothes me, so what is your excuse? Is your love but a word?"
How does one answer a child? Addiction is no excuse. During my addiction to Crack, we saw a billboard on the bus stop that said, "Child abuse is when you won't call your child." How many times, how many years was I guilty of such, stuck in the utter selfishness of my addiction, and even when I had money to send to my children whose mother was struggling to feed, clothe and house them while I sat in a wretched hotel room consumed in smoke that even killed the flies before their death crawling on my funky SRO hotel room floor in the seedy filthy rooms of San Francisco's Tenderloin District from which I am thankful God Almighty blessed me to survive, recover and ultimately reunite with my precious children.
Stupid shit is as stupid does. It takes the same energy to do stupid shit as to do righteous shit, though it may be painful when one attempts to reconnect with children suffering neglect, abuse and lack of love. It may take years for children to recover and reclaim faith in parents, mostly fathers, but it can be achieved because the Joker is that children need parental wisdom their entire lives, so if you missed the first quarter, catch them and support them with your wisdom in the fourth quarter, yes, when you may have nothing left but a Hail Marry pass into the end zone but it will suffice as a touch down in the midlife crisis of their lives. Yes, it may help them transcend stupid shit!
--Marvin X
5/30/21
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